Somewhere right behind you, the giants of England

‘Gog. And who else?

‘Magog.’

‘You’re kidding me!’

‘I’m not. ‘

‘Giants?’

‘Of course. Giants of England. In fact giants of London, or London giants. I’m not sure which.’

‘With names like that?’

‘They weren’t good at names in those days.’

‘Why not?’

There weren’t many around.’

‘Names?’

‘No, giants.’

‘You think maybe ‘Gog’ was a thing and one giant said, ‘Look that’s a Gog. And the other giant said: ‘No, that’s my Gog!’ Except he spoke funny, I expect giants probably did, on account of being giants, and said, ‘No, it’s ma Gog.’’

‘And then they had a fight about it?’

‘Or a laugh. What do you reckon the Gog was?’

‘A toy maybe.’

‘Do giants play with toys?’

‘When they’re little, maybe they did. Gog could have been a spoon.’

‘Or a rock.’

‘Exactly.’

‘When they were little, they weren’t giants.’

‘Course, they were. Just little giants.’

‘You don’t know much, do you?’

‘I know a bit. I know they’re still around.’

‘What! Gog and Magog?’

‘Yes, Gog and Magog.’

‘You don’t have to repeat me.’

‘Sorry.’

‘Where are they, then, these two giants?’

‘And all the giants of England?’

‘Yes, them too.’

‘Right behind you.’

‘You’re kidding me!’

‘Not.’